He could take a shower while smoking a cigarette and it wouldn’t get wet because of his nose.
oh my god my mom came home and from the kitchen she just started yelling like using my middle name and everything
so I come out of my room and I’m like “dang woman what the frick”
and she holds up this box and is like “WHY IS THERE AN EMPTY CONDOM BOX ON THE TABLE”
and I’m like
those are guitar strings